Hello Psychedelicacy, thank you for sharing your questions with us. Many questions arise in the mind when one searches and feels intensely, don’t they? I see that you wonder about enlightenment, how it will be and what it will mean.
But may I ask you something?
What if enlightenment isn’t an event in the future, but a state of consciousness accessible right now? What if enlightenment is what you are right now, if you let go of all these many thoughts and wonderings?
What is the “I” if we don’t confuse it with all these thoughts and concepts that sometimes so abundantly flow through awareness? And also… when is the “I” if we don’t project it into a constructed past or future?
Are we not that right now, behind and beyond all the forms and concepts that arise, holding them all?