Lovely to meet you here as well. You ask an interesting question: “What must one hold in consciousness to remember past, present, future, and still want to hug the person standing next to them?”
For me, there are three questions here — one about forgiveness (and gratitude?); the second, about letting go and the third, about love. If love is universal and eternal, perhaps that better merits a comment in-and-of itself — could be a new question in the forum altogether! (Aurora, what do you think?)
Forgiveness, in my own experience, seems to be so difficult for the ego-mind, but at the same time essential for our well-being. We now know that disease often has roots in dis-ease, or the holding of negative thoughts and emotions: stress, anger, hatred. Medicine may come up with treatments or therapies to mask or even, in some cases, cure the sickness, but what if there are other ways to heal–like a daily gratitude practice? Ritual forgiveness practices? Expressions of caring? Or simply listening to the other? I think many religions have these ideas at their core. If we engage in such practices on a regular basis, do we still find the need to hold on to the hurts, slights, upsets and misunderstandings that we have held and nurtured along with the pain?
So then, how to let go? Some of these painful memories feel like a reminder of who we are. “I’m the one whose mother abandoned him.” Or “I’m the one whose husband cheated on her.” All of which may speak to deep childhood wounds. But is there something that we can learn from the experience while, at the same time, not holding on to it as in any way defining, allow us to transform them into love? Which perhaps leads to a fourth question about acceptance. Accepting what is, and the part we are playing in it, feels important, not in the sense of determinism (e.g., This is fate; we have no choice) but from knowing that what happened in the past has led us to a new experience, and now we are free to see the story in a different way and make other, hopefully, better choices.
And could our ability to transform our experiences from pain and memory to learning and love lead to transcendence?
As much as anything else, thinking through these questions in community like the one on this forum (and what a wonderful group of people here!) I am beginning to understand that can perhaps help one another to see the Common Unity (my new way of defining “community!”), things that we all share in navigating this amazing life as a path to greater evolution.
And we don’t need First Contact with aliens to find that — just First Contact with ourselves and our fellow human travelers through the cosmos. But then, come to think of it, wasn’t that the real theme in Arrival (and ET, and so many other great books and films like it?)
I don’t know — just musing on the possibilities here. What do you think?