Dear @susan , ah, uncertainty and the fear of the future… yes. You surely know you’re not alone about that. I always wonder how we people are supposed to feel secure and trust if we are convinced that we have no say in what the future brings. For a tiny person on the surface of a tiny planet swirling who knows why and how somewhere in a black void can’t really have much to say about anything, right? Not to mention that this tiny person has only so long before it vanishes who knows where… Yes, that perspective can’t be other than traumatic and truth be told, most people walk around trying to hide, from others or themselves, the traumatic impact of such a view.
But then there is another view, which the authors of YATU are presenting as the only logical one, and which many of us gathered here on the forum have experience of. This other view says that the tiny person, and the entire timeline called yesterday-today-tomorrow, are within that which is our real identity- consciousness.
And so if the person with her yesterday, today and tomorrow, is a story in consciousness… then things change. If my past is a story I tell about myself, if my present is a point of view chosen and constructed from concepts created in consciousness, and if my future is a story I weave too… then there is no fear, no trauma, and no worry. If my body is an embodied story, and if I can understand how I construct it, and if I can freely choose the building materials and flavor of the story… then the body is my work of art, my toy, my joyful expression. If I live in a story where the body is an unpleasant, faulty thing, then the body will shrivel and fall off from my story, for I don’t give it life anymore 🙂 If I on the other hand love and admire my bodily creation, and nourish it with love and attention, which is creative energy, then my body will spin like a cat and it will confirm my appreciative story about it by blooming right before my loving inner eyes.
My body is my embodied story, my thoughts are the energy I use to create it. My entire world is my creation, for all people are also bodies imagined in me and situations are my interpretation of how all things relate and what they are. My future is simply how I look on my creative process. What kind of person and world do I want to experience? The present is what I experience now, and the future is simply what I want to experience. We can only be afraid of the future if we don’t know that consciousness creates the next and next experience. Most often, this happens automatically, from conditioned patterns. But when consciousness is no longer bound by unconscious patterns, when consciousness realizes itself and its power… then every experience becomes blissful, and the fear of experience vanishes.
So if you are a person, you are pretty powerless and you’re perfectly sane to be afraid. But if you are the consciousness in which the person and her story are created… then you have the entire power. Most of us are somewhere inbetween, and all that matters is that we know which way to move 🙂
What @celia described in her very moving story is how she found the way out of the illusion that she is the creation, and remembered that she is the creator of the body-story. Sometimes great challenges can cause that shift, when we can’t find any way out horizontally… we might find ourselves moving vertically. It’s like waking up from a dream- for in the dream you believed you were the dream character, and when you wake up you know very well that you were the dreamer of that dream and that all characters were in you. That’s what it takes to not be afraid anymore… recognizing who you really are, and knowing your real power. For you are right now creating the body and world you experience, you already are the creator and you already have the power of creation. It’s only a matter of using it consciously 🙂